What my friend's death is teaching me this year....

Acceptance.

It was late Monday night at 12am, almost 4 months ago when I heard that my beloved friend was killed earlier that morning at the age of 40.

The angels had literally swooped me back to the states, which was a series of synchronistic events, prior to his death. We shared a home together, and we had created a safe haven full of soul family, soul animals, and loving community.

My beloved friend was a lover of many kinds. A true lover of the arts with exquisite taste and attention to the finest details of pleasure. He was hilarious and sassy. He was conscientious, had the softest most generous & giving heart, and was a visionary & a do-er in this world. All of his ideas he co-created were always about community and bringing more love, beauty, & freedom to humanity through the arts, music, culture, and the healing world. He created an actual community for all of us to share and join together in friendship and home. He was one of the most loving, inspiring, & generous hearts I've ever known.

He was killed by another man. There were a string of these murders targeting the LGBQT community, and his was another one of this thread.

When our mutual friend told me the news, I felt flooded with the deepest emotions all at once, and had (still have) many flashes of vivid memories come to me as if I were seeing our lives together flash through my mind within seconds...

The rainbow flag, that he proudly hung up at the front entrance for all of the city to see. It was the first rainbow flag in the city, and I can still see his gorgeous smile of pride for being himself as he welcomed people from all over the world home to our home so they felt safe, welcomed, and felt belongingness. He was a mover & shaker for the LGBQT community, and is one of the major courageous humans bringing the next revolution of freedom to Mexico.

Life is poetry. I open myself to the gifts within his passing.

He shares major messages to elevate humanity not just in the way he lived life but also in the way he died.

I understood that the guy who did this was ashamed of his own self, but still in my intense feelings of grief, shock, & deep sadness, I kept asking "Why did this have to happen???" "This wasn't how it was supposed to be!" and "We didn't see this coming!"

I understood it through a psychological & spiritual lens but I wasn't interested in dishonoring my friend's life (and death), nor myself by spiritually bypassing my deep grief & all of the rich gifts here by superficially jumping to the higher perspective.

I desire to drop to my knees to feel it all, and to rise within the power of honest emotion to meet with my spiritual knowing.

Through my daily contact with my beloved friend from "beyond the veil", he communicated to me a major gift to receive. He showed me how this human didn't "take" his life because my friend loved men, it was because this guy wasn't willing on accepting & loving up his own shame within himself.

In that moment, I heard the voice say to me,
"What about you?"
And then asked,
"What are you not accepting within your own self?"
"Where are you not in acceptance of the people in your life?"
"Where are you not in acceptance of any part of your life?":


My entire heart exploded open to the grace of his death, his eternal life in this moment.

There had been many places in my life that'd been challenging for me to accept. Not having my biological family in my life anymore who were supposed to love me unconditionally and share basic respect. It had been challenging to accept them for who they are & for who they are not. Feeling challenged with accepting myself for making the conscious choice to leave this family lineage of fear, because I felt deep guilt around making that massive choice of Self-love for myself.... because, was I really worthyof loving myself that much?

Yes, I am worthy. I accept my worthiness now.

Also, I had not been accepting myself for WHO I truly am; that there's nothing damaged about me or wrong about me and there's nothing villian-ness about me; no matter what I was ever told or believed to be as truth about myself.

I'm learning to accept that I am a powerhouse of the heart. I am perfectly imperfect and a courageous, brave Soul. I am a fierce truth bringer, and I'll only stand for truth & honesty no matter the cost or the loss in my life.

I'm also learning to accept that many times I feel shame when I'm vulnerable, and that this is a natural part of the human experience. (Thank you Brene!!) I accept that I love up the shame more times than not now as it arises, and I feel deep self-love as a result of allowing myself to be this vulnerable & real.

I'm learning to accept even more how loved and important I am to many, without minimizing my own inherent gifts. It can be easier to see others with profound love than it is to know ourselves. Our honest knowing of ourselves is a lifelong relationship til the day we leave these bodies and remember it all ;)

This is where our power is. Rather than blaming or focusing on how others have "treated" me or how someone else "killed" my friend, who I adore beyond measure, I go within.

I do what I wished that person had chosen to do for himself, which was to accept himself & love UP, relentlessly, all parts of his own shame with all the self-love that he too had always been worthy of... And, he still is worthy.

Acceptance is were liberation exists.

Acceptance is a choice. It's one of the most challenging experiences to be present with because within it requires a lot of letting go.

It requires being truly honest about those in your life who don't serve the truth of you & letting those people go. It's being honest with yourself how limiting belief systems are lies you've believed about yourself, they're harming you, are outdated, not serving you anymore, and it's time to let them go. It involves feeling a lot of painful emotions that you may have stuffed inside yourself when you were a child out of survival, and choosing to love her up loyally for the rest of your life.

Acceptance is how this world changes. As you accept the areas of yourself, relationships, & your life that you've been in denial of... you begin to take more empowered actions to change your life.

You begin BEING and living a more authentic and honest life.

You begin allowing only those who match your authenticity into your close circle.

*Can you feel that? From that real place, where you accept full responsibility foreverything in your life, can you feel and imagine what's possible from this place?

*Can you feel your own self-love & personal freedom as you step into more ownership ofall the things in your life?

I'd love to hear from you how you are accepting ALL the parts of yourself and your life!

Sending unconditional PRIDE to you in every moment,
Janet

3 ways to level UP this holiday season

Don't trip this holiday season...


So,

You're on your way to your family's gatherings or you yourself are hosting this year and you're feeling triggered or dread just wishing it to be done with already?

Or perhaps you don't actually have "family" to gather with and are feeling alone or pressured?

Or maybe you're feeling joyful, appreciative, & peaceful? 

Remember there's a literal holiday collective "vortex" that automatically activates your insides... for deeper healing.

Whatever your experience, be an even stronger version of yourself this time around by plugging into the only true place you're highest self desires to be anyway, which is withYou.


Here are my top 3 ways to stay connected during this time of year:

1--Say NO.  You have the right to not be so flippin busy.  Prioritize what and who are important for you to spend time with.  Say No to those events & gift exchanges that you simply don't have a desire to be a part of.  The more you say No, the easier it'll be to heal the real experiences that trigger the bejesus from you because you'll have way more energy and connection to your self-power to do so.


2--If that familiar person is creating problems & pressures where none exist or blubbering words that're not serving anyone including themselves, and results in you feeling the impulse to get far away or be later left cleaning up the energetic messes within your own self.... then... kindly excuse yourself. 

Yes, you have FULL permission to leave the room, to leave the party, to go outside and take breaks away from whatever it is that doesn't serve your highest self.  Just as everyone has freedom to show up however they may be showing up, you too have freedom to take care of yourself and remove yourself from the situations that don't serve you. 

Even just taking breaks will result in you feeling an increase in your own power to honoryourself and your needs, and it just might be enough to turn the gathering around for yourself so you focus on interactions that do UPlift you.


3--Remember that EVERYTHING you're experiencing in your environment is a direct reflection of Yourself on the inside.  That means that you place the power back into your own Self.  You see how Uncle Seth, your boss, or your Mom are showing up isinformation for you to know an even deeper, more true part of you.

Or, if you're feeling all alone, you claim all of those parts of yourself, loving you Up and your inner child back into her Wholeness.

See all of your environment and triggers as gifts of valuable information and opportunities for deeper healing.  Use this season to heal the parts that're ready to be healed and also to release more in your life that doesn't line up with who you are becoming.

This may include releasing people who no longer align with your true self.  

Have you gotten the memo that abusive, toxic relationships and tolerance to them are no longer acceptable to the collective?  You have FULL permission to release all of them.

I'm not sayin it's always the easiest to do but it's guaranteed that you have a mega posse of Angelic support guiding you, loving you, delivering the best of the best to trigger the f#ck outta you so you can heal deeper in ways your soul is ready for.

Know that your Angelic posse doesn't judge you, they unconditionally love you, and they're always with you celebrating you.

I invite you to use this time, the final 6 weeks of 2018, to clean her up as you prepare readiness for this upcoming grand year ahead of you.

Complete all cycles that're outdated for yourself, balance your karma scales upright, and open yourself to the newest blessings and beginnings that you're ready to experience into your new year.

I'm here celebrating you for all of your victories!

The #1 essential to manifest your abundance is to...

Reeeeeeeeelax & Chiiiiiiill out.

Do whatever you need to do to relax yourself on the INSIDE.  

We're all energy, vibration, and the universe (which is us) responds to our vibration.

Get present to these 2 questions:

1---What FEELINGS will more money bring you?  

2---What THOUGHTS will you be thinking the more you're FEELING those feelings that more money brings for you?

Will you be feeling and thinking more peace & calm?

Will you be feeling and thinking more freedom, fun, & joy?

Will you be feeling and thinking more spacious within yourself?

FEEL these feelings Now.  

Align with these thoughts Now.

BE these experiences Now.

Do whatever you need to do to remain in this space. 

I'm not saying it's always easy to do BUT if you desire to experience the life of your dreams then this is what's required to experience it.  

It takes practice just like anything else!

And it does get easier just like anything that you continue to practice.

It's a muscle that needs to get worked and it WILL get stronger for you.   

REMEMBER.... The Universe is ALWAYS working on your behalf to bring you even MORE, but you must allow yourself to chiiiiiiiiiill and relax the f#ck out.  

Let the Universe do what it's designed to do, which is to romance you like no other in ALL the ways that bring you joy.

YOU are soooooooooooooooooo worth it.

Rise Now with 4 steps...

Be honest, speak up, and LOVE yourself!

Your REAL power resides within the same space where all your life's traumas, challenges, and hardships are stored.  

Rise not despite your pain.  Rise FROM your pain.

Heal ALL of the parts INSIDE of you that've ever experienced betrayal, loneliness, over dominance, & grief of any kind.   

You were born to THRIVE.  You came here to THRIVE.

4 Steps to Rising Now in this time and space:

1--Speak up, tell your truth, be seen, be heard no matter what you may fear.

2--LOVE yourself so deeply and so highly, Woman. 
BE DEVOTED TO YOU, and allow others to treat you the way you allow yourself to love you.

3--Connect into your WHY and your higher purpose on this planet. WHY are you here? What makes your life worth living? How can you be of greater contribution to our planet on the daily?

4--Get extra help from loved ones, professionals, coaches as needed.

We ALL need help and guidance to live our BEST life possible.

Your inner girl is calling for you to love her, Woman...

It's always time to love up your inner child, your inner girl.

If you feel triggered, wounded, sad, angry, rejected, abondoned, resentful, invisible, anxious, scared.... 

LOVE UP YOUR GIRL.

If you feel excited, joyful, blissful, euphoric, hopeful, motivated, inspired, loved...

LOVE UP YOUR GIRL.

Tell her ALL of the things you needed to hear and needed to feel when you were a little girl, teenager, young lady, woman.  

Slow down.

Be present with her. 

Listen to her. 

Validate her.

Let her know that you have ALL the time in the world for her & that you're with her for eternity.  You're not going anywhere this time!

The reason you may feel separate from her isn't because of what that other person/people did or didn't do or give to you, it's because ultimately you turned your heart away from her.

There's no judgement here.  You've done nothing wrong.  You've done the best you could do by protecting her (you) when others & the world around you weren't so kind to her (you).  

Thank your protective self, your ego mind, for taking care of her (you) in the best way it knew how to at the time.  

Now it's time to tell it that it's job is over.

You're a Woman.  A strong, beautiful, emotionally intelligent, capable Woman.  And it is your Woman that is running the show now.  

Show your little girl the Woman you've become, and love her devotingly & with constant loyalty.

Choose her (you) before anyone or anything else.

Choose her (you) in every single moment of every day until she gets that you are the one she's been searching for, dreaming of, waiting for her entire life to come rescue her.  

You are The One.  The one & only.  Good news at that!

Wherever she is, so are you.  You are One of the same. 

You are her solution and you are her greatest miracle of love she's been searching for her entire life.  

From my inner girl to yours,
Janet

Ever wonder WHO you really are?...

IMG_4359.jpg

Hello Universe,

YOU...

are the cosmos
the planets & constellations
the fairy dust of enchanted forests
the warmth & energy of the sun
the waves of the ocean
the power of the moon
the godly paws of our angel animals
the giggles of pure children
the creativity of brilliant artists
the intelligence of divine nature
the power that pulsates our hearts
to our ONE beating heart
& ONE intelligent mind

(wink wink)  Do you remember?

(nudge nudge)  How will you be YOU today, which will remind others who they really are?

Have FUN with it!

Lovin you infinitely,
Janet

Acceptance & Letting Go

There is always a divine order, purpose, and intelligent force streaming through our every moment, but this is not to say that our life as a human is a fair one.  Sometimes, there is taking one for the team.  There is a certain amount of grace that is called forth when we must accept that we are channeling the divine, and as a result of this divine expression, we move with the natural impulse of highest order of love.  This process may result in relationships of all kinds ending, but it does not mean it is a failure or anyone failed.  It may simply mean that this specific way that is being birthed into expression is the way that love is flowing in that moment.  I accept this.  I accept all circumstances as they are and as they unfold.  I hear the call from deep within me that moves me to express in a myriad of ways.  I align with our divinity no matter what the consequences or result of this alignment brings me; no matter what other people judge me for.  From this place, I regret nothing.  I grieve at times because sometimes the action that is called for will surely bring relationships & life experiences to a completion of their course.  There is loss.  There is sadness, but suffering is minimized when I accept this wholeheartedly and let go.  It requires me to be unattached to specific people & specific experiences remaining in my life.  It requires a dedication of being in servitude to this higher power no matter what this means for my life.  It means I will certainly experience disappointment and at times devastation, but it also means I will surely receive and experience love and power beyond measure.  I must remember that love has infinite faces.  There is love that is the happy go lucky, feel good experience.  There is love that is the down right dark and dirty truth, and I will rise with truth no matter the cost it brings in my own life.  I breathe as I accept, and then I let go. 
---Janet Nicksic

Moving beyond fear...

The first part is always awareness.  Awareness of the fear and how it's impacted your life.  Then take it as a challenge to move beyond it and do the things you want to do.  Everyone has fear, but DO things anyway otherwise you end up feeling powerless, unsatisfied, resentful, and with more fear.  Discover what is going to be your friend to assist you in moving on and beyond despite the fear.  Don't let the world have control over your experience.  You'll remember everything in the moments you die and then it'll be too late to live.  So remember these things NOW.  The world is a wide range of experiences, including it being a gorgeous, thriving, adventurous place.  Do whatever you need to do to SEE it that way.  Perceptions determine our reality.

5 quickies to alleviate depression

Depression is a MAJOR epidemic in our world today especially in our modern western society and with everything that has been happening in our world lately. 
Have you been feeling depressed?  

Here are 5 things that can help you NOW:

1---BE KIND, loving, & gentle with yourself.  Depression has the tendency to be the opposite of loving to oneself.  It can have the person believing they are worthless, not good enough, comparing to others, feeling like a failure, and have reason to feel shame.  Recognize this is the depression speaking and take steps to counteract this by speaking gentle thoughts to oneself, take a bath, get a massage, do something simple and sweet for yourself.  Any seemingly tiny gesture is a grand gesture when it comes to depression.

2---Depression feels like a dark, gloomy cloud that lingers and clouds one’s judgement and lense of the world.  Counteract this by bringing more LIGHT into your life.  Again, tiny gestures can help. Get sunshine and Vitamin D literally into your eyes and on your skin, surround yourself with jewelry and crystals that emit light and beautiful colors, look at imagery of vibrancy, look for the rainbows and prisms of light wherever you may be. If you are not feeling the light within then BRING the light to you.

3---Depression can bring about physical complacency and immobility of movement where one may not feel like doing anything and can struggle just to leave the house.  Remember that this is NOT “laziness”.  This is the depression that creates this struggle. Do whatever you can to go for even a small walk.  Leave the house if even just to go to the store or to go outside to take some deep breaths of fresh air into your body. Small physical movements and getting yourself out of the house can be a big success for someone experiencing depression.  Celebrate that and honor yourself for challenging yourself and the depression. This seemingly small gesture can bring relief to your body, mind, and spirit.

4---Remember that depression is all about secrecy, isolation, and aloneness.  It will have you believing that you are all alone and we are all going to die so what’s the point.  It can create the feeling of a dark lonely isolated world.  Recognize this and remember that CONNECTION counteracts loneliness.  Reach out if even by phone to a close loved one.  Go to the store and even make contact with the person checking out your groceries.  Look into the eyes of a stranger and say hello.  You never know how much they might need you to connect with them.  A little connection goes a long way.

5---Always remember there is help.  If you or someone you love is experiencing depression and really needs assistance, there is always a skilled professional or professional resource that can help.  Depression can run deep within someone and sometimes it just isn’t possible to pull oneself through it by oneself.  We all need help at times.  This takes strength and courage to seek it when we are in over our heads. 

3 Tips for bringing more JOY into your holiday heart space

This is a time of a year that can bring mixed emotions up for people.  It's a time for holiday "cheer" and celebrations to be shared with family and friends, and also it can be a time of dread and despair for others.  Not everyone has close friends and family to share time with, or perhaps it may be a time that brings up loss, grief, unresolved family emotions, and strained relationship dynamics. Wherever you may be, just know that you are not alone and it is completely natural to be feeling however it is that you feel.  Here are 3 tips to keep you more grounded this holiday season and hopefully allow for more joy into that precious heart of yours.

1--Spend within your means.  That's right.  Be super conscious how and where you are spending your money this holiday season.  Know that you are already enough with or without giving that gift that you might be tempted into getting because it seems like a "good idea" at the time or you think it will make that person "happy".  Remember that your presence alone can bring real joy into someone's life.  Your presence is enough so remember that.  Be conscious in giving gifts that have meaning & purpose, and that are in alignment with your financial means so you don't go into debt over it.  Know your own value.  This is the best gift you can give to others.

2--Take regular time for yourself even if it's only for a few minutes each day.  This will keep you more centered and grounded within your own heart, mind, and body.  Take time to be with yourself in a quiet place or in nature, take some deep breaths into your body, feel your body and appreciate your body for being vibrant and alive.  Since it's the end of the year, this is a good time to reflect on the year that has past.  Release what has been lived and experienced, release patterns and situations that you are still holding onto, appreciate what has been experienced and learned this year, and welcome into your heart what is to come.

3--Remember that even if you do not have close people in your life to share time with, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.  We are never alone.  Even if we tried, we could never be alone.  Remember that there are beautiful, open hearted people wherever you go.  Strike up even simple conversation or say a simple "hello" to the cashier, banker, post office worker, fellow human walking on the street next to you.  A simple exchange can drastically change one's feelings of connectivity and hope. Remember that you have no idea how your simple gesture could provide hope to the other person on the other end of the exchange.  We never really know what anyone is going through internally so never underestimate what the power of a friendly smile or warm eye contact can bring to someone who just might be feeling all "alone" in their life.  

Whatever your life situation is during this holiday season, I wish your heart the deepest and warmest of joy and peace from within and into your life experiences.
Blessings,
Janet

Bringing the LIGHT during this political season

Have you been experiencing great challenges during this election season so far?  Just remember that you are not alone.  I have experienced much success myself by applying the 4 principles below in feeling more connected and deeply powerful, which is why I am sharing these with you today.  Let's please remember that antiquated, out-dated systems are coming up above the surface for us to come face to face with to really see if it's current to remain or current to replace.  Planet earth is all about creating more intelligent, sustainable, and workable relationships and anything outside of this are being demolished; it's only a matter of time.  This is a reminder that there is massive purpose and value in precisely what is occurring at this moment, and there are ways to remain hopeful, CONNECTED, loving, and POWERFUL.


4 ways to BRING THE LIGHT:

1--BREATHE, BREATHE, BREATHE, BREATHE.  MEDITATE.  PRAY.  EVERY DAY.  Connect to your internal SOURCE.  Allow for your SPIRIT to cleanse you from the inside out.  It makes ALL the difference in the world. NURTURE your SPIRIT.  Remember that our external world is a mere reflection of our internal world.  Change it on the inside and the outside changes as well.  

2--Take ACTION when inspired to do so.  That anger and frustration can be useful when it's un-suppressing you, and used as momentum to take action in the direction you desire to experience our world.  Remember that you are VITAL to the entirety of our WHOLE.  Every action you take makes a huge difference; even if it doesn't appear to be that way.  If you don't know how to take action in productive ways then contact like-minded political groups you support for guidance, get involved, open your eyes without letting the "shadow" experience of the world dim your light, connect in person with people you love, have FUN, help someone in need walk across the street or give them a good meal, SMILE to people on the street, say hello to your neighbor, wave to our beautiful animals and trees, BE KIND.  Get back to basics, get back to roots, get back to soul, and get back to our HEART.

3--LISTEN to others.  I mean, really listen to others speak.  It may be challenging and honestly, sometimes excruciating to listen to others talk about perspectives that differ so largely from your own value systems. These are the moments where it is even more crucial to truly listen, listen without judgment (or at least try to!), listen without "cutting off", listen without thinking about what your rebuttal will be or what you are going to say next.  JUST SIMPLY LISTEN. Get CURIOUS about the other person and where they are coming from.  What are they really saying behind their words?  What are their true values, fears, and hopes for our world? Hold calm space as much as possible (or at least neutrality).  Remember that the quality of the actual SPACE that gets created between people actually determines how much infinite possibilities are even a possibility. Don't set out to change peoples' minds.  Set the intention to LISTEN to our fellow humans without judgement.  Set the intention to create a SAFE, respectful space where people feel heard and respected to SHARE themselves.  Space that gets created in this way has the capacity to open all of our minds, awareness, and open to the TRUTH.  You just might find how limited your own way of thinking has been:)

4--EXPECT MIRACLES.  I have found that the one sure way to experience miracles is to expect them!  See miracles wherever you are. Acknowledge miracles every single day from the seemingly tiniest of miracles to the seemingly largest of miracles!  Be in the practice of noticing the LIGHT in the world and the world will bring so much more.  Some days it may be challenging to connect with this source, and this is understandable as we are all having a human experience.  As much as you can though see the TRUTH of the LIGHT that exists inside every single living thing.  Expect GRAND miracles.  

--Janet Nicksic